Wednesday, October 26, 2005

White House to Onion: Stop using seal - Oct 26, 2005

I'm pretty sure I've seen the presidential seal on unofficial things before. But I'm not surprised that the first President to whine about it is the current idiot.

"I would advise them to look for that other guy Osama (bin Laden) ... rather than comedians. I don't think we pose much of a threat," [Scott ] Dikkers[editor-in-chief of the satirical newspaper] said.

Yeah, that might be a good idea. Of course that's a lot harder, and we know the President only likes to talk about doing hard work.

Posted by 7 comments

Man fined $300 for impersonating Roethlisberger

What the fuck? I will never undestand why it's against the law to take advantage of someone else's stupidity. Especially in a situation as harmless as this one.

Posted by 1 comments

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Wal-Mart to open 270 to 280 supercenters next year

Oh good, because if there is one thing that I'm always complaining about, it's that there is never a Wal-Mart around when I need one.

Posted by 6 comments

Bush refuses to hand over Miers documents / Nominee's chances for confirmation appear in jeopardy

This is strange. Apparently, both Democrats and Republicans are requesting documents to try and figure out where Harriet Miers stands on things. It's weird because when Democrats were requesting documents on Roberts, all I heard from Republicans and their supporters was that it was a partisan move just to delay the confirmation. But apparently, when Republicans want documents, there must be some higher moral purpose. I wonder how these hypocrites justify this kind of thing to their supporters. Oh, that's right, they don't have to, since they have all the with us or against us blind loyalty supporters on their side. Well, that must make things easier.

Posted by 1 comments

Monday, October 24, 2005

So that's how a real President would do it...

So, once again I find myself watching The West Wing to see how a real President acts. Firing someone who is close to him for leaking classified information without any hesitation even though the person leaked that information with good intentions.

Quite a contrast to the real world where the leak is done purely for partisan political revenge, and not only are the people involved not fired, but the President hems and haws and qualifies earlier statements that made it sound like he would be tough on people involved in the leak, and now is "waiting for the results of the ongoing investigation" which I think will change once again when the investigation is concluded and the indictments come. Then it will be wating for the results of the prosecution. Then if anyone is convcted, he will finally take decisive action...to pardon them. The only reason for a President to handle it this way if he supports what was done, whether he knew about it beforehand or not.

Posted by 6 comments

Dear Bill Parcells -

I know you're kind of stubborn, but I thought when you took my advice previously, we had figured out what the strengths and weaknesses of your team were, and decided that you should play agressively and try to win games before they get to the final minutes. You have now lost two games to teams that were dominated by your defense for around 55 minutes. If you expect to be able to win these kind of games by now, then you're just fooling yourself. The defense also gave up a late game tying touchdown last week that could have lost the game. But I guess since you squeaked out of that one with the win, you didn't learn anything. Anyway, to play the kind of game you want to play, you need a few things. First, you need a defense that will play the same way in the final minutes as they play in the rest of the game. You clearly don't have that. Second, you need a good kicking game. But your punter is mediocre, and the long snapper and kicker suck so bad that if I were coaching yesterday, I would have told them to find their own way home. Finally, you need a running game that can run effectively even when everyone knows they're going to run. And despite the fact that you piled up a lot of yards on the ground yesterday, when it came to the drives late in the 3rd and early in the fourth when you almost exclusively ran the ball, they couldn't get a first down. So, since we know all these things, maybe you could take the handcuffs off the offense and throw it down the field a little more often, especially since almost everytime you do, it works out pretty well. A four point lead is nowhere near big enough to sit on. I know you tried to do it late yesterday, but by then it was too late, and the fumble on the flea flicker really cost you, but if you try some of those plays earlier, maybe one little mistake wouldn't be so magnified. Anyway, you fell from first place to last place with that loss, so maybe you will wake up a little bit now and start using the weapons that you have before your team throws in the towel.

Posted by 3 comments

Friday, October 21, 2005

ABC News: Warner Bros. Backs Blu-Ray DVD Format

I don't really care what high definition DVD format is backed by who, or which one wins out in the end, it will all sort itself out eventually. However, if it's going to be this one, they need to come out with a better sounding name than Blu-Ray because that's just gay. Don't they have some kind of marketing department that gets paid to come up with catchy names? If so, they need to fire them, because Blu-Ray just sucks.

Posted by 8 comments

Thursday, October 20, 2005

The Daily Northwestern - Student group faked abduction at University Place ATM, police say

Ok, I know I have at least one Northwestern alum as a reader, so what's going on over there, Ace?

Posted by 4 comments

Take Action: FMA Hearings: Tell your Senator to STOP wasting time on the Federal Marriage Amendment

Apparently, having fixed all the ills that plague professional sports, Congress now finds itself with nothing better to do than talk about getting hate and discrimination added to the Constitution. Not only is this just a bad idea in the first place for lots of reasons, but as the link says, it's also a waste of time. Even if you hate gay people, you'd have to be an idiot to think that there aren't a lot more important issues in this country that need the attention of Congress. So click the link and tell your Senators to stop wasting time on trying to figure out how to discriminate against people.

Posted by 1 comments

Happy Somethingorother*

A year ago today, I started this blog with this post, which wasn't very interesting, but whatever. At the time I wasn't expecting anyone to read it, and I didn't really know what I was doing it for, I just knew that I had this BlogThis! button on my Google toolbar that I wanted to try out. I figured if I kept posting at all that it would become a more personal kind of journal. What actually happened was that as I read other people's blogs, I realized that I wasn't the only person in the world who didn't worship George Bush, so my frustration with the people who do really become the focus of most of my posts. Also, since it was right before the election, that magnified it for me. And of course after the ridiculous results of that election, my frustration only grew, so it was nice to share my thoughts with people who felt the same way, since at the time, there didn't seem to be enough of us. Not enough to get rid of the idiot, anyway. Now, it seems that things may be turning back towards a more reasonable, less ignorant attitude, and I like to take credit for that.


Anyway, I thought I should post something to commemorate this occasion. Please feel free to send gifts.**

* I refuse to use silly made up words like blogiversary.
** Or cash.

Posted by 17 comments

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Rice Wants to Follow Afghan Model in Iraq

What, you mean the model where we go in, change a lot of things for the better, only to have them all undone when we all but leave to focus our resources on other operations that make far less sense? Well, there's a few things wrong with that plan. First, we really haven't done much good in Iraq in the first place. Sure we got rid of Saddam, but a lot of other things came down with him, stable, secular government, working infrastructure, women's rights, etc. Second, we've already pretty much made a long term commitment in Iraq, and to largely abandon it the way we did Afghanistan would be all but impossible without making that guy you worship look like a flip-flopper. And finally, even if we could successfully abandon Iraq, we'd be hard pressed to find somewhere else to invade that made any less sense than invading Iraq did. I guess we could invade one of our allies or something, but that would come along with its own set of problems. Also, I think we're fresh out of NFL players who can be sacrificed as heroes. Anyway, I don't think we can really handle Iraq like we did Afghanistan, and if anyone ever paid any attention to Afghanistan anymore, we might find looking back, that that model wasn't really all that successful in the first place.

Posted by 9 comments

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Potential threat briefly shuts portions of I-95

Hmmmm, I guess this means the indictments are imminent.

Posted by 5 comments

Iraq vote counts 'point to fraud'

I've been very critical of Bush and the war in Iraq in the past. But this news makes me see that I was wrong. If the Iraqis are already holding fraudulent elections, then they've already reached a point in their democracy that it took us over 200 years to get to here in America, so good for them.

Posted by 4 comments

Monday, October 17, 2005

Rome

So, I've been watching Rome on HBO, and it's pretty good so far. But last night as they found Cleopatra, I realized that Lucius Vorenus and Titus Pullo are the Forrest Gump of the Ancient World. If there's a historically significant event, they'll be involved somehow, and if there is a person of consequence they will have at least met the person at some point. I fully expect them to be in some way involved in Caesar's assassination, then with Octavian's rise to power.

Posted by 6 comments

Defense readies case on intelligent design

These people should have watched The West Wing last night, as Jimmy Smits' character summed the whole debate up pretty well. Which kind of makes me sad, since the fictional President, and both fictional candidates for President are vastly superior to what we have in reality. Hell, at this point, I'd rather have Martin Sheen, Alan Alda, or Jimmy Smits over Bush, nevermind their characters.

Posted by 8 comments

Narnia film stirs controversy over Christianity

I'm not sure why there's any controversy over this movie. I'm not the slightest bit religous, and I'm really looking forward to it, because it's a great story. I read all these books several times when I was a kid, and really didn't even notice the religous parallels until the last book, where it was a lot less subtle. Anyway, regardless of how much religion is or isn't in these books, they're entertaining stories which is all I really look for in a book or a movie. I'd only be offended by a story being too religous if it also sucks, like that Left Behind crap.

Posted by 4 comments

Friday, October 14, 2005

Friday Name that Movie

Not so good last week. Anyway, here we go again. Keep in mind, when I do these themes, I may repeat a movie or two that has been used before if it fits my theme. Guess them all (and the theme) and you may win a prize.* And be sure to check back tomorrow for Saturday Night Name that Song.**

1. America is the richest, most powerful country on earth. If America was a woman, she would be a big-tittied woman. Everybody loves a big-tittied woman!
2. Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today.
3. If lovin' the lord is wrong, I don't want to be right.
4. I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you.
5. You'll be missing me when you have that big white wrinkly body on top of you with his loose skin and old balls... gross!
6. I can get a good look at a T-bone by sticking my head up a bull's ass, but I'd rather take the butcher's word for it.
7. This is good. It's like the Flintstones car wash.
8. You'll be whistling 'Zip-A-Dee Doo-Dah' out of you're assholes!
9. He was wearing my Harvard tie. Can you believe it? My Harvard tie. Like oh, sure he went to Harvard.
10. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!


* There is no prize.
** If I feel like it.

Posted by 14 comments

Bush Teleconference With Soldiers Staged

Whaaaaa? Bush staged something? That can't be true...

Seriously, people shouldn't be surprised at this point that Bush used soldiers as props for political gain, what they should be surprised by is that he bothered to use real soldiers at all. Seems like by now, he should have a studio outside the White House and some extras on hand to handle these things. He could have a hurricane set, an Iraq set, and then he wouldn't even really need to go anywhere. Actually, better yet, he could have the studio built at his "ranch" and he could add an Oval office set. Maybe he could also build a George Costanza style area under his desk so he could sleep on the job.

Anyway, I just find it funny that Bush staging things is news. Hasn't this been going on the whole time?

Posted by 8 comments

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Frigidaire sucks - Part II

Some of my two or three long time readers may remember my original Frigidaire sucks post. Well, anyway, they did manage to fix the refrigerator after about two weeks without one. But of course a couple of weeks ago (or shortly after the warranty expired), it broke again. So we just bought a new one, which sucks, since it was barely two years old, but hopefully this one will last a while. Anyway, I just wanted to let everyone know not to buy a Frigidaire. Not because of the product being a lemon, that is going to happen, and could with any brand, I'm sure, but because their service sucks and they don't care about their customers getting what they paid for.

Posted by 6 comments

Litmus Test

I'm starting my own litmus test, with all the talk about them relating to Supreme Court nominees. Mine will be, if any reporter, pundit, Congressman, Senator or whatever uses the phrase "litmus test" when talking about confirming a Supreme Court nominee, then I'm just going to assume that they don't know what they fuck they're talking about and don't have anything worthwhile to say on the subject.

Posted by 5 comments

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Comment Spam

So far, I had only noticed a couple of spam comments on my blog (so I guess the spammers don't realize this is the hottest blog on the internets), so I thought that I wasn't getting any. Then I went to look at an archived post, and realized that it's all over my older posts. So I do have a lot of it, and I guess the spammers aren't too good with dates. Anyway, I'll probably be implementing that word verification stuff soon and wanted to let everyone know why.

Posted by 57 comments

Maybe he could write a song about it

I don't listen to country music, and I really don't like any of it, so I hadn't heard anything about this, but I saw it on Jason Mulgew's blog (which by the way is really funny) and thought it was pretty strange.

Bad enough to be in that situation in the first place, even worse to have to update all your fans about it on your website.

Posted by 8 comments

Is it time for finger pointing yet?

I'd almost forgotten (as I'm sure was the intention) that all the Bush lovers haven't told us it's time for finger pointing and blame-gaming yet, even though they assured us that there would be plenty of time for that later (as they pointed fingers at every Democrat in Louisiana, and blamed the victims for being too stupid to leave). But my last post reminded me of it, so I'm asking again.

Posted by 4 comments

White House Briefing  News on President George W Bush and the Bush Administration

I was reading about Matt Lauer's interview with the village idiot, and one thing in particular struck me:

I do my job as best I can. One of the things that we do is we respond to crisis. And as I told the people, if I didn't respond well enough, we're going to learn the lessons. If there's any mistakes made at the federal level, I, of course, accept responsibility for them. . . .
emphasis mine

How is he still getting away with this "if" bullshit? Shouldn't the next question be, "You always qualify that reponsibility by saying 'if mistakes were made on the federal level', shouldn't you know by now if mistakes were actually made, and why don't you recognize them and take responsibility for them?" I guess people are just still in shock that he said anything is his responsibility, and that he allowed for the possibility that mistakes were made. But as shocking as that is, it should be about time to nail down exactly what mistakes he's made and see if he will be accoutable for them. Of course he won't, but since he actually opened that door for once, someone ought to try to walk through it, and force him to slam it shut so everyone can see it.

Posted by 1 comments

NicoShot - Nicotine Beer Designed to Help Drinkers Quit Smoking

Yeah, this is a good idea. Now, instead of being addicted to cigarettes, you can just replace them with beer, which works out well if you're already an alcoholic, but isn't so great otherwise, since you'd probably be a lot more likely to become one when getting your nicotine from the beer.

But it can help you make changes in your lifestyle without having to walk out of the bar for a quick smoke to deal with sudden withdrawal symptoms.

Yes, because the worst problem with smoking is that it takes away from that precious time that could otherwise be spent drinking. Thanks, NicoShot for solving that problem!

Posted by 4 comments

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Records suggest warm relationship between Bush, Miers

Ok, I think I've figured this nomination out. It looks like Miers was stalking Bush, and he nominated her to the Supreme Court in order to focus her attention on something else. Because, seriously, she's obviously not qualified for the job, and who else but a stalker would write things like this:

U.S. Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers told George W. Bush in a 1997 birthday card that he was "the best governor ever" and, in a separate note to her boss, said she hoped his twin daughters recognize their parents are "cool."

I'm pretty sure I've never told anyone that I think they're cool. And how old is this woman, anyway? Her pictures make it look like she's about 100, but these letters make it sound like she's closer to 13. Like this:
In 1997, Miers sent Bush a belated birthday card featuring a sad-looking dog and the note: "Dear Governor GWB, You are the best Governor ever -- deserving of great respect!" She added, "At least for thirty days -- you are not younger than me."
emphasis mine
See, I understand kids just think of someone's age as the number itself, and so may equate someone who has just turned 13 to someone who is about to turn 14, but I would think by the time you get to be 52, you might be smart enough to realize that someone who is 11 months younger than you is always 11 months younger than you.

Now, normally, I'm completely in favor of any and all information being released to the public. But now I'm going to propose that any furhter correspondence from our government officials be classified. It's bad enough that I have to see how stupid these people are based on the decisions they make, but seeing their little birthday notes to each other and notes about going to the bathroom is just too much, and I'd just rather pretend they didn't exist.

Posted by 2 comments

Monday, October 10, 2005

Dear Bill Parcells -

I wasn't even aware that you read my blog. Nevertheless, I'm glad that you took my advice.

And I hate to say I told you so, but you might want to notice that you only scored 3 points in the 4th quarter, and only 6 in the second half, and you didn't even need those points. The key to this was obviously the 27 points scored in the first half, including 17 in the first quarter. You may also have noticed that yesterday was your best day rushing the ball so far this season, which seemed to be the goal of your previous strategy that failed pretty miserably. That's because it's easier to run with a big lead, and with the defense worried about getting beat deep. No thanks are necessary, just keep up the good work.

Posted by 4 comments

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Saturday Early (Stuck at work on the Weekend Edition) Name that Song

Here we go again. Guess them all (and the theme) and you could win a prize.*

1. You're all that I ever known, when you smile, on my face, all I see is a glow.
2. You Have To Show Them That You're Really Not Scared
3. Still in dress she used to wear, Faded feathers in her hair
4. I done told you once you son of a bitch I'm the best there's ever been
5. Oh can't you see You belong to me?
6. You'd rather see me in the pen Then me and Lorenzo rollin in the Benzo
7. Back in the day There was this girl around the way
8. No more The crap rolls out your mouth again
9. You can scratch my back, we'll get cozy and huddle I'll lay down my jacket so you can walk over a puddle
10. I got more rhymes than the bible's got psalms



* There is no prize.

Posted by 9 comments

Friday, October 07, 2005

Friday Name that Movie

Not so good last week, I think there are still some movies left, and the theme was only almost guessed. Anyway, here we go again. Keep in mind, when I do these themes, I may repeat a movie or two that has been used before if it fits my theme. Guess them all (and the theme) and you may win a prize.* And be sure to check back tomorrow for Saturday Night Name that Song.**

1. Stanley?
Yeah, you know...like the power drill.
2. Disturbing the peace? I got thrown out of a window! What's the fuckin' charge for getting pushed out of a moving car, huh? Jaywalking?
3. Yeah, why don't you just go home and brush that tooth!
4. Well, maybe you can help me straighten out my Longfellow.
5. Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how the V.P. is such a V.I.P., shouldn't we keep the P.C. on the Q.T.? 'Cause if it leaks to the V.C. he could end up M.I.A., and then we'd all be put out in K.P.
6. I know this is our first date but do you think the next time you make love to your boyfriend you could think of me?
7. That John Denver is full of shit, man.
8. I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me me.
9. Hey, girl! You gon' eat yo' cornbread?
10. I'm so against working I wouldn't even take a blow job.


* There is no prize.

Posted by 10 comments

Poll: Bush Ratings Hit New Low

Good. I'm glad his poll numbers are finally starting to actually reflect his performance. And just to be clear, I should point out that I'm not hoping for him to fail because I don't like him, I don't like him because he's a failure. And I'm not happy that his poll numbers suck because it makes him look bad (although that's ok by me), I'm happy because people are finally starting to realize how bad he is.

But I have mixed feelings aobut these things, too. On one hand, I'm glad that people are finally starting to see what a fraud this guy is, and hopefully that will lead to us not making similar mistakes in the future. But on the other hand, I just want to scream at people "What the fuck are you seeing now that hasn't been there the entire fucking time?" Bush hasn't changed one bit, it's just people's perception of him that has changed. Maybe if they hadn't been so blind, or apathetic, or whatever in the first place, then this guy wouldn't have gotten elected (or appointed or whatever) in the first place, or re-elected after that. Seriously, all the things that he's criticized for were there in 2004, except for the hurricane response. Some of them have developed a lot more during that time, like the Plame leak, and the non-existent weapons of mass destruction, but everything was there before the 2004 election for anyone who wanted to make an informed decision.

Anyway, hopefully these new attitudes will be reflected in the midterm elections in 2006, because Bush isn't doing this crap alone, and again in the 2008 Presidential election, assuming anyone worthwhile ends up running.

Posted by 8 comments

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Bush says more sacrifice needed in war on terror

"Bin Laden says his own role is to tell Muslims: 'What is good for them and what is not.' And what this man who grew up in wealth and privilege considers good for poor Muslims is that they become killers and suicide bombers. He assures them that this is the road to paradise, though he never offers to go along for the ride," Bush said.


Wow, I always realized Bin Laden was an asshole, but what kind of a man who grew up in wealth and privelege would try to tell poor people to sacrifice for his cause while not sacrificing anything himself? Someone would have to be a real dickhead to do that, I wonder if there is anyone else in the world who would do something like that. I wonder...

Posted by 10 comments

Senate Approves Detainee Treatment Rules

Delivering a rare wartime slap at Pentagon authority and President Bush, the GOP-controlled Senate voted 90-9 on Wednesday to back an amendment that would prohibit the use of "cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment" against anyone in U.S. government custody, regardless of where they are held.


Jesus Christ, I can't figure out what bothers me more; that we need a bill to tell us not to treat people badly, or that it's actually opposed by 9 Senators, the White House, the Pentagon, or anyone else in power. Anyway, it's still nice to see something with bipartisan support, even if it is something so basic that it should be assumed in the first place.

Maybe if we beat those other nine Senators enough, they'll change their votes. After all, they are in favor of that sort of thing, right?

Posted by 3 comments

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Assisted-reproduction bill would bar singles, gays

Reading what little I've read about this stupid bill, it seems like it would do a lot more than that. It looks like there would an excuse to bar pretty much anyone that the government wanted to from having a child using assisted reproduction, given the extent of the assessment required. Not that just banning gay and single people from having kids isn't bad enough.

Even in the ridiculous time we live in, where people don't seem to understand the role of government at all, and would rather vote for people that make them feel safe, rather than people who actually do anything for them, or who make them feel like they're better than other people rather than trying to make everyone better, I still don't see a law this ridiculous having any chance of ever even threatening to be passed, so it really woulnd't normall bother me all that much.

Luckily, our son is the genetic child of both my wife and myself, so this wouldn't apply to us anyway, but if it did it would have likely made it impossible for me to have my son, or at least made it much more difficult (and it was had enough already, not so much for me, but for my wife who had to do all the work), since he was conceived using IVF. I'm not at all religous, don't participate in any faith based activities, my wife has been married before, we don't really have a lot of money, so I'm not at all confident that we could have gotten a positive assessment under this ridiculous law. Anyway, anything where the government might try to regulate IVF really gets to me, since it hits so close to home.

No one should have to prove themselves worthy to reproduce. It's a basic fundamental right that shouldn't be regulated by anyone. And even if we could all agree that people should have to prove it, I don't think the standards suggested in this law would help at all in that regard. Excluding gay people, single people, non-religous people, all those people can be great parents, and all the married, straight religous people can actually turn out to be horrible parents. It's not something you can predict ahead of time.

Strange (ok, not really) that this law is being pushed by a Republican. What was that about small govenment again?

Posted by 11 comments

New nickel gets hint of a smile

Didn't we just get a new nickel? If they keep changing all the money at this rate, it's shortly going to get very confusing. Remember, this is the country that couldn't tell the difference between the quarter and the Susan B. Anthony dollar, and is apparently afraid to use the Sacagawea dollar, so how are we going to manage if there are 52 different quarters, 4 or 5 different twenty dollar bills and a few different nickels? Anyway, aren't we rapidly approaching the time when nickels are as useless as pennies? Oh well, I guess they probably needed to do this to combat rampant nickel counterfeiting.

Posted by 0 comments

Reading

So, I finally finished re-reading The Hitchhickers Guide to the Galaxy series by finishing Mostly Harmless (review). I was glad I re-read the series, because I remember how great the first three books were, but after reading the last two, I'm also glad I'm done with it. The last book was especially underwhelming. It had many of the same great characters and some of the witty dialogue that made the series so good, but not enough of it, and the plot was not very well developed.

I'll probably go to the library today and look for something new to read, but if I don't find anything that looks good, then I'll just start reading Cryptonomicon, which I have at home.

So what is everyone else reading? Any recommendations?

Posted by 9 comments

Monday, October 03, 2005

Bush Chooses Miers for Supreme Court

I admit I don't really know too much about the legal profession, or the Supreme Court and its procedures. But is it really too much to expect that people nominated to become the most important judges in our country to have actually been judges before? Maybe it is, I guess.

Now, I know experience and qualifications don't count for much with George Bush, but after hearing some early reports that people think this is a great move because there aren't any rulings for Democrats to pick apart in order to challenge the nomination, I just wonder if being qualified has now actually become a liability under this administration.

Posted by 10 comments

Broadcasters Piss Me Off - Sideline Reporters Edition

Is there a more useless job on the planet than the sideline reporter at a football game? If there is, I don't know what it is. Aside from reports on injuries, which would get relayed up to the booth and reported anyway, I can't remember ever seeing one who offered any useful information. I don't need to hear what coaches have to say during the game, especially when I can construct my own cliche filled assessment of whatever is going on, and it won't be littered with the annoyance those guys project when doing those interviews.

On Saturday, I was watching the Florida Alabama game, and the sideline reporter was interviewing Don Shula, and apparently according to her, what all of America wants to know (which is actually how she phrased it), is how much Don Shula helps his son coaching the team. Are you kidding me? Does anyone (besides the airhead reporter) actually think that Don Shula helps coach that team?

Anyway, just get rid of these people. Surely anyone who saw Eric Dickerson on Monday Night Football a few years back can agree that this is a position that is unecessary.

Posted by 2 comments

Cowboys Suck

Dear Bill Parcells -

I know you like to try to keep the game close and "win it in the fourth quarter," and with a couple of breaks, the Cowboys could easily be 4-0. However, they could just as easily be 0-4, and in reality they are 2-2. That's the problem with the win it in the fourth quarter approach, is that it's just as easy to lose it in the fourth quarter. And maybe you haven't been paying attention, but in all 4 games so far this season, anytime you have bothered to actually attempt to throw the ball down the field, it has worked out pretty well. The long touchdown to Patrick Crayton yesterday, as well as big plays to Terry Glenn in every single game so far. That leads me to believe that the long pass is something that this team does pretty well. And while I think this team can also run the ball pretty well, it wouldn't hurt that running game if they hit on some of those big plays early in the game rather than late. Maybe they won't work, but it's hard to tell if you never even try. Next week, you have a tough division game which could be a pivotal point in the season, maybe that would be a good time to stop being so fucking predictable. Otherwise, you're doing a great job, keep it up.

Posted by 8 comments

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Saturday Late Night Name that Song

Here we go, late start, so these might all suck, since I'm going to rush through them. Anyway, guess them all (and the theme) and you could win a prize.*

1. Dressed up like a million dollar trouper
2. I'll serve your ass like John MacEnroe
3. The western desert lives and breathes In forty five degrees
4. If you need a friend, don't look to a stranger
5. everybody go hotel motel holiday inn
6. Just rest your breast on my chest, yes I'm impressed
7. All I wanna do is zoom-a-zoom-zoom-zoom
8. Remember Toora Loora Toora Loo-Rye-Aye
9. The land lord say your rent is late He may have to litigate
10. I forget myself I want you to remind me


* There is no prize.

Posted by 7 comments