Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Michael Bolton

Ok, I know his name is John Bolton, but honestly, can you really think about this guy without thinking of Michael Bolton? Anyway, while I'm sure there are plenty of reasons not to give this guy the job of representing the US at the UN, including the fact that he's been very vocal with his negative opinion of the UN. Also, just the fact that Bush nominated him should be enough to disqualify him, considering the ridiculous nominations this guy makes over and over again, but since there's no one else to nominate these guys, I guess we have to live with them.

But really, you don't even need all that to realize this guy isn't qualified for the job. All you have to do is look at a picture of him. Now when you wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and see this staring back at you, there are several options you can explore:

1. Shave the moustache (this is probably the easiest)
2. Don't dye your hair anymore
3. If you must dye your hair, also dye your moustache
4. Shave your head (this one may be a bit extreme)
5. Shave your head and your moustache (even more extreme)
6. Shave all your body hair (not recommended)

These are all pretty obvious choices that most intelligent people would consider when they are faced with the situation of looking ridiculous in public with facial hair that is a different color than the hair on their head, but since Bolton hasn't bothered to do any of these things, it shows that he either doesn't realize how ridiculous he looks or is too stupid to figure out what to do about it, either way, he's not too bright, and therefore doesn't deserve the job.

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